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View Full Version : He messed with the wrong people.



Doug
03-20-2006, 10:47 PM
Warning: Long read but worth it. Of course maybe you will get to the end and realize it wasn't but you'll be screwed by then because you already read it.

So the other day in my computer programming class, which happens to have a chineese professor, things started to get complicated. I better start by telling you that I am in no way a racist but this man is incapible of understanding the English language. This I do not understand because he can talk in a way that is mildly understandable but he cannot understand English language at all.

Now, I don't pretend know all there is about computer programming, in fact, I know very little. My friend, however, is very good at it. We went to highschool together and us, along with our other friends, had some pretty good practical jokes. Needless to say we both were lost along with the class, which consists of roughly 20 people. My friend finally raises his hand and brings this to Mr. Lee's attention who of course does not understand what he means. His request was simple "Could we please see some code so we can better understand what you are trying to show us" which was met with something completely off base.

So as the class drew on we were silently talking with each other trying to understand what he was teaching when I think he got angry. He called my friend out saying "Do you have something to say?" Well, my friend did have something to say. It wasn't disrespectful or snotty he just reasked his question. This time it was met with a 10 minute speech on respect and something about his kids talking about grades and some other very hard to follow and completely meaningless things.

So we were to write a plan for this next program that we have. A program over the stuff that we are paying him to not teach us because he cannot understand our questions. The following is what I wrote. I may have gone a little too far with the big fancy words and the way I word the sentences but as I said in the title, he messed with the wrong people.

THE PLAN


In commencing this programming assignment, I will first proceed to research a little further on the essentials of linked lists. My perception as to what they truly consist of is indeed mildly cloudy. There is a certain ambiguousness surrounding the meaning of the linked list that I aim to eradicate in its entirety. After the removal of the aforementioned ambiguousness, I will proceed to writing the program. As of this time I am inapt to provide you with an extremely analytical form of just how I will construct this program. My vindication for this indeed goes back to the ambiguousness that unfortunately surrounds the linked list. I will give you my most sincere assurance, however, that I will strive to eliminate this which will, in turn, allow me to eliminate the estrangement that I feel toward the linked list. The linked list is indeed rather perplexing to me. It seems that it could prove quite useful if I learn the proper ways to harness its power. As I previously stated, I apologize for seeming shallow and pedantic as I am really not. I assure you that I am giving this assignment utmost importance in my large agenda and when completed it will be a reflection of my hardest a most diligent work.



Turning it in tomorrow, well see how it goes.

By the way, my friend wrote his like that too. :D

James
03-21-2006, 02:02 AM
Took me sitting there for a second or two to figure out that that's what you wrote, rather than just saying your plan for the project. I was just like "Where's the practical joke?"

Say discombobulated in it.

Sagewing
03-21-2006, 09:40 AM
Anytime someone says 'aforementioned' I take them less seriously. Pick your battles :)

Erin
03-21-2006, 12:54 PM
It would be even funnier if you'd used English correctly throughout. ;)

You need to talk to a higher-up in the department to make either a formal or informal complaint; you may also ask whether your university has a TSE (Test of Spoken English) requirement for its professors. It's funny, but the TSE is usually required for TAs, but not for the actual professors.

I was in this situation once, but I was too young to know what to do. I later found out through a classmate that she'd filed a complaint and some action was taken as a result. I also found out that the professor I had would mix his native language with English while he was speaking, but I couldn't tell at all because he was so hard to understand.

Oh, listening and speaking are two different and but not completely separate skills.

moonshield
03-21-2006, 01:42 PM
I'm in college right now and if I go into the first class and can't understand my professor, I drop that class. Use ratemyprofessors.com to your advantage, suffering through a semester of pain is not worth it. :)


That said, I wouldn't recommend you act like a smart*** to a professor, it would not be unlikely if he fails you on the spot.

Henny
03-21-2006, 01:47 PM
Why not just replace all of his pens with chopsticks. :angel:

peach
03-21-2006, 02:27 PM
I thoroughly adore writing english in an exceedingly complex manner, exhibiting the prodigious vocabulary of the english language.

I had to write a number of essays for my IB grade in English and they are graded by content/structure/language. I always scored 9's and 10's for language and mediocre grades for the other 2 parts, because I just had too much fun coming up with ridiculous english word.. I didn't care to make too much effort on producing an interesting story.

mini
03-21-2006, 04:13 PM
Hi Peach,

LOL@your plan.

I totally understand how you feel. It sucks to get something which is worth 1/4 of the price you've paid for. I went to uni/college (as what Americans would call) and had a similar situation - with Indians (again I'm not racist, I have many great Indian friends).

Some suggestions:
1.Dont you have a newsgroup that you can complain about so that the whole course (including your head of department/dean) would read?

2. Create a petition - emphasizing that you get a 'lemon' professor. Use an example, if you have paid $100 for a box of 100 g fine chocolate, you expect a full box of chocolate (a well knowledge programming professor who speaks fluent english and know how to teach)

3. Play a prank on him so that he hates it so much he quits and hopefully you get a better replacement - I doubt that this one will work, Chinese are very persistent and tough to break ;-).

4. for a passive mode, tape every single lecture you attended and try to get used to his accent (you can always repeat it many times) and if you still can't understand it, go and meet someone higher in your college, and get them to listen what you've taped for :-)

I'm a big believer that losers stay at uni/college after they graduate because they can't get a job outside their comfort zones or too 'chicken' to be in the real world ;) and Yes, all my ex-lecturers are loserssss!!!! :D!

Good luck and keep us updated.

deronsizemore
03-21-2006, 05:16 PM
laser pointers always worked in really pissing off our professors in college... :)

Doug
03-21-2006, 09:53 PM
I was thinking about going and complaining. It sounds like if I do that there will be a small army of other classmates behind me. He did finally throw up some code today so it was a little easier but I am still learning nothing from him. I am learning by interpreting what he puts on the board and looking things up in the book and on the internet to write the programs. I didn't pay to do that, I paid to be taught.

James
03-21-2006, 11:55 PM
http://www.thegreenhead.com/cool-stuff/2005/06/10-million-candlepower-spotlight.php

Get a group of 5-10 people to buy these then when he faces away from the class turn them all on. When he turns back, off.

Doug
03-22-2006, 01:04 AM
That would be classic. It would confuse the crap outta him. I wanted to find a way to tap into the speakers with a laptop. I doubt there is any way or someone else would have already done it but the speakers in the room are wireless I believe. If it could be done that could make for an interesting class and there would be no way of knowing who was doing it because it is a computer programming class and half the people have laptops. I could just randomly throw some funny noises out at different times. I doubt I could do that though.

James
03-22-2006, 01:45 AM
You'd be able to figure out the brand, and if they're anything like the headphones I'm wearing, chances are that you'll be able to pick up the signal and there'll be a few different channels to switch through till you find his. You'd probably want to do something to increase the strength of your signal, such as a signal amplifier or http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cellular_repeater (I'm not sure if this would work with speakers; however, I have picked up cellphone calls on wireless headphones before)

Doug
03-22-2006, 10:41 AM
I am really going to have to look into this then because I could have a lot of fun with that. I wouldn't go way too overboard, just a few subtle noises every once and a while. Subtle but hilarious noises.

James
03-22-2006, 06:27 PM
Oh, and you may want to consider something involving bubbles. They're always fun.

Doug
03-22-2006, 10:01 PM
I wonder if they make a remote controlled bubble machine or smoke machine that I could conseal somewhere in the room before he gets there. Bubbles would be better because it wouldn't make as much noise. I could hide it somewhere where they wouldn't be noticed until they floated down from the ceiling a bit.

Erin
03-22-2006, 10:51 PM
I know you want to mess with the guy, but seriously, think about the other students who will take the class after you.

I gave you some good advice: ask the dean whether the guy took the TSE.

Westech
03-22-2006, 11:00 PM
Erin's right. Messing with him might be fun but if you really want to get something done you should go through the proper channels. Harrasing your professor and disturbing the class will only get you labeled as a troublemaker and give the administration an excuse to ignore you.

Talk to the Dean, email the President, write a letter to the school newspaper, post about this guy on every professor ratings website that you can google, and encourage your classmates to do the same. Future students will thank you.

Doug
03-22-2006, 11:19 PM
Yea, thats a good point. That escillated quiclky, I mean, that really got out of hand. Ok so I stole the last sentence from Anchorman. You guys are right though, I don't want to get carried away. I know the head of the computer department is also someone who doesn't speak english as their native language. I'll have to go higher up than that I think. I'm sure I could get enough people to come with me that they will listen to us.

James
03-23-2006, 12:46 AM
The skeleton was denied a bank loan.

You'd be best to arrange for as many members of your class as you can to go see whoever may be able to help your situation... It's a slightly less "Menace to society" thing to do than what we had ;)

But hey, if you ever have a job and want to go out with a bang, just post another similar thread ;)

Doug
03-23-2006, 01:51 AM
You can bet I will. There were some good ideas cooked up in this thread.